Thursday, September 19, 2024
Hi. My name is Micky, and I’m a worrier.
Okay, we are not convening a session of Anxiety Anonymous. But I need to come clean right from the get-go and confess that this article is as much therapeutic as it is instructive.
If worrying were an Olympic sport, I'd have more gold medals than Michael Phelps, and my face would be plastered across Wheaties boxes, looking concerned about cholesterol levels. Anxiety, it seems, is always ready to compete in a race you didn’t even sign up for.
But here’s the kicker: anxiety, while uncomfortable, is actually trying to help. It’s like that friend who insists on karaoke night but only ever sings the old Queen hit “Under Pressure” — well-meaning, but perhaps a little misguided.
So, what can you do when anxiety decides to crash your mental party? Here are a few tips for not just managing anxiety but also reframing it as something that could, in its own odd way, work for you instead of against you.
WHAT IS ANXIETY, REALLY?
Picture anxiety as an overenthusiastic friend who wants to help but doesn’t know how. It tends to show up uninvited and overstay its welcome. But before you push it out the door, consider what it's trying to tell you. In its essence, anxiety is an evolutionary response designed to keep you safe. It's like an overzealous smoke detector that goes off not just when there's a fire, but also when you're making toast.
Instead of treating anxiety as an enemy, try to understand its role. It’s your mind’s way of waving a red flag, saying, “Hey! Something’s not quite right here.” So, instead of pushing it away, try to listen. What's making you anxious? What’s triggering that internal alarm? You may find that acknowledging the cause helps you regain control over the feeling.
REFRAME ANXIETY AS EXCITEMENT
Here’s a fun trick: what if, instead of labeling that gnawing nervousness as “anxiety,” you started calling it “excitement?” Anxiety and excitement actually feel pretty similar in your body — rapid heartbeat, sweaty palms, racing thoughts. But while anxiety feels like a leg cramp you can’t stretch out, excitement is that same leg cramp coiled up like a spring, ready to launch you into action. By reframing anxiety as excitement, you switch from dread to anticipation. This simple mental shift turns your anxiety from a stumbling block into an energy source.
GET A SENSE OF CONTROL BY PLANNING
When you feel anxious, it’s often because of uncertainty. Not knowing what’s coming can feel like navigating through a fog with no map. But guess what? You can make a map. If you’re anxious about an upcoming event or task, break it down into smaller, manageable steps. Write a to-do list or create a plan. By doing this, you create a sense of structure, which in turn reduces uncertainty — and with it, anxiety.
Planning is like turning on the headlights when driving through a dark road. It doesn’t eliminate the journey, but it sure makes it a lot less terrifying.
CHOOSE EXCELLENCE OVER PERFECTION
Frankly, I could write for hours on this sub-topic alone. It’s here that this insidious tendency hits me hardest. Anxiety and perfectionism are best buds. When you're stuck in the mindset that everything must be perfect, it's easy to become paralyzed.
The fear of making mistakes can freeze you into inaction. But here’s a freeing thought: strive for excellence, not perfection. As screenwriter Terry Rossio once said, “My lousy way of getting it done is better than your great way of not doing it.”
Perfection is the enemy of progress. Once you let go of the need for everything to be flawless, you’ll be amazed at how much easier it is to take action — and how much more fun life becomes.
THE QUICK FIX FOR ANXIETY? PEOPLE YOU LOVE
When anxiety gets particularly overwhelming, nothing beats the calming effect of people who care about you. Psychologists call this “social buffering.” Being around others, especially those who make you feel safe and supported, naturally reduces anxiety. Whether it’s a heartfelt conversation, a hug or a shared laugh, human connection has a unique way of easing stress.
Think of your loved ones as an emotional exfoliant. They help you shed that thick layer of worry, leaving you feeling lighter and more grounded.
WHEN ANXIETY TAKES A HIKE
Imagine this: your anxiety finally decides to pack up and take a vacation. It’s like realizing you've been wearing 3D glasses your entire life and you just took them off. Suddenly, the world isn’t an endless maze of traps and pitfalls. Instead, it’s just a slightly flawed but mostly okay place where you can wear one blue sock and one black sock without a care in the world.
Making decisions — like what to watch on Netflix — no longer feels like you're stuck in an existential crisis. Social events go from being a game of emotional Minesweeper to actual fun. And sleep? Oh, glorious sleep. Once anxiety takes its leave, you’ll find that sinking into bed feels like being wrapped in the warm, cozy embrace of your favorite TV show theme songs.
Anxiety is a part of life, but it doesn’t have to control your life. By reframing it, planning through it and leaning on the people you love, you can manage anxiety and, in many cases, even thrive because of it. And when you do, you'll find that the world is a much more welcoming, less daunting place — flawed, but totally livable.
micky@hcnews.com
